


Susceptible

by ernyx



Series: Poly fics (for ease of finding) [3]
Category: Marvel, Marvel (Comics), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Action/Adventure, F/F, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Past Brainwashing, Rating May Change, Rescue Missions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-29
Updated: 2018-05-03
Packaged: 2019-04-29 17:39:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,250
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14477820
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ernyx/pseuds/ernyx
Summary: ”This is stupid, you’re not doing this alone.”“It’s just a recon mission, it’ll be fine! Since when are you the worrywart? Stop stealing my job!”“James, I’m serious. This is way more dangerous than you’re making it out to be. The KGB is involved.”“I’ve survived them before...”But of course, they all get more than they bargained for, and healing from old reopened wounds doesn't get any easier with age.





	1. In From The Cold

**Author's Note:**

  * For [places](https://archiveofourown.org/users/places/gifts).



> Got this on my tumblr ages ago:  
> Hey! Please don't pressured to fill this! I'm a glutton for any pairs in the MCU so pick the one you're feeling the most! Genders are up to you ;~;. If you're doing femslash feb, that's neat too! Relationships: NatBuckySteve, BuckyNat, IronWidow or Romanogers. Prompt: Rendezvous after a mission. Hurt and comfort or D/s would be lovely, angst with a hopeful ending if you're inclined  
>   
> HELLO! This is eight thousand years late and I apologize for that. I’ve been so busy it’s unreal. I’ve completely missed Femslash February…. And March….. ANYWAY! Better late than never, yes? This is not finished yet but I've got a lot of the next chapter written (it will probably be a two-shot, but might end up being three depending on how carried away I get).  
> this is one of my rare fics NOT crossposted from my tumblr and I'm pretty busy right now but feel free to send me prompts here or there and I'll try to get to them eventually!

      They’re far from home, and entirely too close to a home they once called their own. Natasha knows better than to think of Russia fondly now, knows better than to let any part of the KGB’s nationalist brainwashing continue to exist in her psyche. All she sees in the blanketing snow are places for her enemies to hide. She walks carefully and lightly, hoping that the whistling wind will muffle the crunch of her feet on the ice that she has no way to avoid. The blinking light on the tracking device is getting closer. 

* * *

      _”_ _This is stupid, you_ _’_ _re not doing this alone._ _”_  
_“It_ _’_ _s just a recon mission, it_ _’_ _ll be fine! Since when are **you** the worrywart? Stop stealing my job!_ _”_  
_“_ _James, I_ _’_ _m serious. This is way more dangerous than you_ _’_ _re_ _making it out to be. The KGB is involved._ _”_  
_“_ _I_ _’_ _ve survived them before._ _”_  
_“_ _It damn near killed you. Shut up. Either you let me go with you as backup or I knock you out and keep_ _you here by force."_  
_“Wouldn’t_ _you like that, Na_ _tasha_ _~_ _”  
_ _“Can you be serious for **two goddamn seconds** , Barnes?_ _”  
_ _“_ _You know you love me_ _—_ _“_

_They were interrupted by the crash of a pot in the kitchen, and peeked around the corner to see Steve angrily putting away the dishes. He glared at them for a moment, a nonverbal rebuke of their argument, and continued his utterly domestic chore of the day._

_“_ _Steve, come on, don_ _’_ _t be like that,_ _”_ _Bucky wheedled, coming over to hug his lover from behind, effectively hampering his movement. Steve never could resist a good hug, especially now that the three of them had gotten together and were far freer with their affection than they had been in the past. He struggled to maintain his stubborn demeanor, but pulled away from the other man anyway, shaking his head._

_“_ _You know better, Buck. One of these days, you_ _’_ _re gonna get yourself killed and_ _—_ _“_  
_“_ _I won_ _’_ _t! I_ _’_ _ll be careful. It’s_   _only going to take a day or two at most, I_ _’_ _ll be back before you know it!_ _”  
_ _“_ _You say that like you're not dealing with the people who brainwashed you back then, Buck. It_ _’_ _s not safe for you to go. Maybe if Nat and I_ _—_ _“  
_ _“_ _Don't_ _you dare. She was brainwashed too, you know. And we both made it out of that. I'_ _ll be **fine**._ _”_

_“_ _It'_ _s your funeral,_ _”_ _Natasha muttered, eyes cast down, and left the room without another word. The boys stared after her helplessly. While they loved her deeply (both independently and together), they didn't_ _always know what she was thinking. Still, they trusted her more than anyone, so they quietly finished the task at hand and then went after her._

_“_ _We'll_ _go together. Keep each other safe. That way I'm_ _not out there on my own._ _”  
_ _“_ _You can keep tabs on us from here, and if we're_ _not back in two days, you send in reinforcements to come get our miserable asses, yeah?_ _”  
_ _“_ _They'r_ _e great asses, actually, but you get the point._ _”_

_It didn't_ _mean she really had to like it, of course, but it would be a lot safer_ _—_ _especially because Steve was notoriously resistant to things like mind control, so having him there to stabilize Bucky would be a good idea. It meant that both her men would be in danger, but that was par for the course in their lifestyle. They didn't_ _become Avengers for the sake of safety, after all._

_“_ _Okay,"_   _she conceded, kissing each of her lovers lightly in turn._   _“_ _Okay, you go in there, you get the intel, and you get home safe. Otherwise I'm_ _coming after you myself._ _”_

_“_ _Yes ma'a_ _m!_ _”_ _They replied in unison, Bucky with a wink, Steve grinning. They always did like what that form of address did to her. Sure enough, she rolled her eyes back and smirked at them, dragging_ _them in for kisses_ _…_ _and far more nefarious things._

* * *

     Natasha clears her mind of the incident, refusing to feel guilty for letting Steve and Bucky go out on this mission without her. It’s not her job to babysit her boys, and they’re generally capable of taking care of themselves. In fact, of all the people on the planet, they’re probably the ones that are _most_ capable of taking care of themselves when faced with a threat… unless you count people like Doctor Strange or Thor, who come and go from the realm at will. If they were around reliably, maybe she would have asked them to do this instead, but it's a moot point now.

     A building comes out of the gloom almost all at once, visibility poor enough that she hasn’t been able to see it as more than a shadow until she’s only a few feet away. The advantage of that, of course, is that they won’t have seen her coming either. Pulling out a scanner first, she checks for any tech on the outside, anything to impede her climb up to the area where the trackers are showing that Bucky and Steve are being held. She mentally thanks Stark for upgrading his tech recently, and allows herself a relieved breath when nothing comes up aside from a few security cameras. They won’t spot her in her all white garb in the snow. If there had been heat signature detection systems, it’d be a lot more trouble.

     Quickly, she pulls out a grappling hook, aiming for a window that is faced away from the wind so that the climb will be quicker and easier. She’ll have to white out the cameras on the way, but thanks to Tony’s work with Peter, she’s got a mini webber in her tactical belt specifically for that purpose. It’s far more effective than the old bubble gum trick, she has to admit.

     It’s almost too easy to break in, and Natasha eyes her surroundings suspiciously. There are no people around, and all the lights are all off. The equipment lying around is cold to the touch, and much of it has a film of dust on top of it. Why the hell would anyone bring Steve and Bucky here?

     She follows the tracker’s directions and finds herself facing a door with a broken lock. Peeking in, she feels her heart stutter in panic. Steve’s shield is lying on the ground, and he’s next to it, motionless on the floor. She rushes in to his side, only to find that there’s another man face down next to him, one she recognizes instantly— Damon Dran. Just the sight of him is nearly enough to have her back away in terror, but right now, she has bigger concerns. She starts by checking over Steve, noting that he’s still breathing faintly, and has no major wounds. As deftly as she’s able, she hauls him up onto her shoulders in a fireman’s carry and moves him out to the hall. All she needs to do now is check the next room, and hopefully find James there relatively intact.

     All in all, it could have gone worse. There’s something hooked up on the soldier’s head, there’a video playing in front of him, but he’s passed out in the chair. Whatever brainwashing was attempted was rejected firmly enough that Bucky’s brain refused to stay conscious. Natasha methodically detaches everything from him, turning the video off with a pull of the plug, and drags him out to the hallway as well. Both of her boys are alive, both of them are relatively safe despite everything, and it’s time for her to let her backup know that they can land the jet at the location and get them out without getting shot in the process. Tiredly, she ferries them one at a time to the front door, and waits for her own rescue.


	2. Coming Back From The Brink

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did warn people that the rating might increase, and we're starting to see the beginning of that bump here. Sorry younger readers, please run elsewhere after this chapter! For the rest of you, the cut from this chapter to the next was both for content and for the sake of getting something posted sooner than later. Sexiness is on its way but you'll have to be patient a bit longer ;)

      Physically, it doesn’t take the men long to heal. Natasha’s boys are as strong as they come, with the serum in their veins, and they’re released from the hospital the very next day. Steve, it turns out, had been hit with some sort of nerve toxin when Dran realized that the brainwashing wouldn’t take. It's easier to kill him if he won’t be an obedient soldier, the man must have thought, but he had no idea how difficult it was to kill Steve Rogers. Natasha, for her part, can't be more grateful that the man who had once been instrumental in tampering with her memories was now dead, and that her boys are safe. 

     Bucky, on the other hand, has taken almost no physical damage at all. Someone had passed off a series of code words to Dran to help subdue the Winter Soldier with his old programming. Bucky has long been broken free of the one that returned him to his obedient soldier state, but apparently there is another set of triggers for keeping him under control if he goes too far off the rails. He’d been docile in Dran’s grasp, trapped in his own mind, and strapped into the chair without a fuss. Now, back in his own head properly, he’s a little bit of a mess.

     They’re all a little bit of a mess, honestly.

     Natasha, of course, is faring the best, having not had to deal with direct combat, though she worries incessantly about Steve and Bucky. Steve is managing, though it’s obvious that something Dran said has really been bothering him. The toxin has left him a little weaker than usual, but he’s sure it’ll wear off in a couple days. Bucky is doing the worst of all, once again feeling every vulnerability of all his past. He barely sleeps, and the tension he carries in his shoulders leaves his muscles feeling like boulders under his skin.

     They do their best to support him, curling around him gently in the night, training with him in the day, reminding him that he’s still theirs, still with them, home and safe, that he hasn’t hurt them, that he’s managed not to fall back into the clutches of his once-abusers. It’s an extremely difficult process, really, because there’s nothing reassuring about the fact that there’s still bits of programming embedded in his mind that turn him into a disabled drone. But they’ve broken through that before and they’ll do it again, so they immediately get to work contacting the people who helped them the first time and put Bucky through the paces of recovery once again.

     At the end of every day, they’re exhausted. That is to say, they’re more exhausted, as they never fully rest. All of them are terrible at maintaining sleep schedules, and any given day finds at least one of them at the gym punching bags in an attempt not to deal with their brain. It’s not exactly healthy, but then nobody is designed to lead as insane a life as any of them do— for nearly that period of time. They’ve had decades and decades of what would have been their ‘peak years’ if they weren’t riddled with violence and heartache.

     In this regard too, Nat is the healthiest one. She’s the only one of the three that actually lived through all her years of existence, awake and learning and adapting at every step. She has eighty thousand coping mechanisms (and it still isn’t always okay, but she’s functional), and she assigns herself the caretaker of her lovers as well.

     Finally, worn out by the hiccups in their recovery (not that she blames them at all for it, it’s just a weary observation), she drags them into her room, sits down in front of them, and admits it. “I need my boys for a little while.” 

     “We’re always here for you, Nat—“ starts Steve, but she cuts him off.  
     “No, солнце, I mean my _boys_.”

     Steve and Bucky look at each other and then back at her.

     “Of course, любимая моя—“ Bucky starts.  
     “Our lady—“ Steve teases.  
     “Our queen~” In unison, with a wink. 

     She laughs and swats at them, but they swarm her like eager pups, somehow simpler and more joyous in this moment. They cover her with kisses, sweet little pecks all over her face, and occasionally one more deeper and passionate, as each catches her mouth in turn. Finally, when she manages to shove them off of her, she can't help but pout.

     “You’d think that being the Domme would afford you some measure of control, but apparently not…” 

     It isn’t really a complaint, and her boys didn’t look chastised in the least, so it doesn’t matter. Still, the way their faces glow with anticipation of pleasing her makes all the exhaustion of the last few days fall away. Natasha beckons them back in, slowly stripping them and offering gentle kisses between each article of removed clothing. Finally, when both of the men are bare, she motions for them to sit back on their heels, bodies on display for her.

     Normally, this part is just her getting to play and enjoy her eye candy. Today, though, it's a slow drag of hands over every inch of their skin, reminding herself that they are whole, that they're here with her, uninjured and willing to subject themselves to her whims. She's the one who gets to dictate what they feel here— whether it be pain or pleasure, whether it be joy or sorrow. She'll take good care of them, and they will be safe with her.

     For now, she is their everything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> солнце = the Sun  
> любимая моя = my darling / beloved

**Author's Note:**

> Comments? Feedback? I'd love to hear it! Drop me a line either here or on my tumblr!


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